The only reason we would ever go about gathering the facts or telling the story of how it is or how it was is if it were something that felt better to do in the telling or the contemplation.
We know that there is a powerful idea in your culture that it's important to face facts and deal with the what-is, on its terms.
But when you remember that you are defining the what-is, by the fact of being the creator and director of your reality, you then remember that if you don't like the what-is, you can decide for something different quite easily and quite gently.
Were you to so do, it might look like this...
Instead of saying, "That's how it was..."
You could say, "I'm not sure what happened..."
Instead of saying, "I know what this is and why it happened..."
You could say, "I don't really know what happened..."
Instead of saying, "I need to figure out what it meant..."
You could say, "It doesn't matter what it meant..."
Instead of saying, "I've got to get this right..."
You could say, "This is working out better than I expected..."
Instead of saying, "I need to get this done..."
You could say, "This is working out perfectly already..."
Instead of saying, "I should have done that..."
You could say, "I'm sure this is working out perfectly..."
You'll notice that the examples we offer leverage uncertainty to your benefit.
I don't know...
I can't quite remember...
Maybe it was different than I think it was...
All of these are openings. They're not the end. They're just the beginning.
You could also notice that it doesn't matter how you arrived in this particular moment, for that is indeed true.
You could also notice that whatever brought you to this place, this is only the beginning.
You could also notice that wherever you think you're headed, it's going to be better from here.
You certainly don't have to be certain about any of this.
In fact, your uncertainty can come in quite handy when you're pretty sure you know all the facts and you don't like the facts.
Maybe you're wrong about those facts.
And that might be a very good thing, indeed.